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Pondering thoughts of my "mission"

So, those of you that read this blog know that I have not had sex for almost one year...as that anniversary fast approaches...I start to wonder...how long can a woman actually hold out? In 18 days I will have gone a full year without the touch of a man. Who am I kidding? I mean yes it became a fun thing to do after I had held out for so long...because eventually not having it ,turned into not wanting it quite so much...and that is when the "mission" was born. But, I sit here thinking about the point of this mission...what it turned into for me. Yes I would love nothing more than to find something more meaningful than a roll in the hay...but I think about how long it's actually been since I had something more meaningful than that...and I'm not going to abstain from sex for umpteen years! And with that I am contemplating how I plan on spending this one year anniversary of not having sex...will I continue down this path of resistance....or do I celebrate riding a nice hard cock? I know right now the latter of the two sounds sooooooo much better.

July 13th is the big day...funny when I typed out that date I realized that was the month and day that I lost my virginity. Of course that was much earlier in my life...it was a Friday the 13th actually and it was close to 20 years ago. At the time it felt like a Friday the 13th...not a pleasant experience...but alas...the same day as my anniversary falls on. I will be in Vegas on the anniversary of this abstinence...I will be drinking to my sex life's non-eventful year. I will be partying with good friends...and who knows what will happen...it will be interesting to write this blog after I get back from 10 days in Vegas. Can I withstand? Will I even want to? It's going to be tough...but I am going to give myself a break...if I decide to spend sometime with a lucky guy and we get lucky...I won't beat myself up because of this damn "mission". And maybe if it comes down to it...I will realize how liberating this mission has been for me, and tell my hormones that they need to chill. Maybe I can hold off...we will see I suppose.